February 2012
3 posts
1 tag
Anonymous asked: Tell us a story, Joe.
January 2012
2 posts
etrangere:
The Mother’s Prayer for Its Daughter
By Tina Fey
First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.
May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.
When the Crystal Meth is offered, May she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.
Guide her, protect...
December 2011
2 posts
Anonymous asked: what did you have for lunch?
November 2011
5 posts
Pike poetry
I think that the Lt. Pike meme should be extended from the amazing photo memes that have been circulating, into the world of poetry; the artistic form of preference for the jackbooted thug. Below is a humble example.
The Road Not Taken - by Robert Frost
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could...
The Fairy of the Phone (1936)
The next time you’re involved in a conversation about the degeneracy and moral turpitude of this generation, point your fellow debater at this video which shows that people in the 1930’s managed to overcome the threatening shadow of worldwide fascism and still be super gay. (Video via @severalbees)
October 2011
2 posts
Anonymous asked: Do you reply to these questions? Where do the answers appear? But more importantly, what are you wearing?
Anonymous asked: Why do Brits insult you and then ask you to agree with them? "You're a right tit, aren't you?"
September 2011
3 posts
“Once a little boy sent me a charming card with a little drawing on it. I loved...”
– Maurice Sendak (via bobulate)
Louis CK speaks about George Carlin
I don’t speak in public much - but I think I have it nailed: if you want to make a good speech, tell the truth as you see it, as simply as you know how. Even if you that means you’re just saying one sentence statements, one after the other.
Because if you don’t, then you can get lost in Trying To Make A Good Speech. And that mostly sucks for everyone.
But if you do, then you...
August 2011
2 posts
July 2011
2 posts
“The first man who, having enclosed a piece of ground, bethought himself of...”
– Jean Jacques Rousseau - “On the Origin of the Inequality of Mankind”(1754)
How I roll
bne: hello
joethedough: up yours
joethedough: \o/
bne: \o/
joethedough: i feel combative
bne: fine
joethedough: as you can see
bne: I'll ignore you then
joethedough: DONE
joethedough: BEST. MEETING. EVER.
June 2011
1 post
May 2011
2 posts
Watchlazenby:
Why do I find this touching?
April 2011
4 posts
March 2011
2 posts
Herb update
We just had it confirmed that Herb did in fact have a stroke on last Thursday night. The neurologist came into Wythenshawe (an honour that shouldn’t be underestimated) to tell us herself and was super awesome about it: direct, polite, a real expert.
So me and Gem and Dr Internet (and a good deal of you too) had no doubt come to this conclusion days ago - but it was different to hear it...
What happened to Herb
I am mostly writing this down so I don’t forget it.
On Wednesday night, Gem was saying that Herb was acting like he was ill - and she was all “mums just know, ok?” about it. Dad and I went for a curry and told her to stop being weird. He woke up a few times in the night, which is unusual for him, but was otherwise fine.
I went to York early on Thursday morning so didn’t...
February 2011
14 posts
Anonymous asked: Why are things so badly broken?
Anonymous asked: How can I beard like Joe?
Anonymous asked: What's the most British thing a British person will say?
Anonymous asked: HOW IS BABBY FORMED?
1 tag
“Well a very very heavay uh heavy det rotation tonight. We had a very der dersin...”
– Serene Branson
Thinkstank: Star Trek: Night Shift →
thinkstank:
TV show, set in the same time period and on the same vessel as Star Trek: The Next Generation, but during the graveyard shift when all the A-list crew members are sleeping or, in Riker’s case, fucking someone or something.
Night Shift’s crew are anxious, bitter depressives, aware that while…
January 2011
3 posts
7 tags
Ghostbusters - Inception
I just wanted to post this because it appeals to that part of me that likes to take frivolous things very seriously. Ghostbusters - like Groundhog Day* - is a film that could so easily have been made into a ‘proper’ film and wears its lightness of touch and deft script very easily. All the flashes of ‘proper’ film making are here extracted and assembled along with the...
December 2010
2 posts
November 2010
3 posts
Mint Julep Recipe
Found it here on Metafilter, couldn’t believe it. Had to get it out there. God bless you
My Dear General Connor: Your letter requesting my formula for mixing mint juleps leaves me in the same position in which Captain Barber found himself when asked how he was able to carve the image of an elephant from a block of wood. He said that it was a simple process consisting merely of whittling...